Got Me Daydreamin'

I just had a realization. When I (or anyone else) daydreams about a person that is of interest, that daydream can give clues as to whether I actually like that person or the memories that we shared. There is this one boy that I daydream about. For example, what we used to do and how I could go back in time and re-do all that we did, but I cannot imagine a future with him. I also daydream of another guy, but this time my day dreams take me into the past memories and future wishes. I can imagine a future with him. There is a difference between loving the memories and loving the person who makes the memories.

Sincerely,
True Predictions!

Who Actually Reads These Posts!

Sometimes I feel like I am just writing a journal entry and not publishing my life stories for the world to see.  For example, I wonder if anyone I care about sees these posts or if the people I write about see these posts and whether they know that I'm talking about them.  Sometimes I hope that they do see these posts just so they know how I feel about them.  Some days I want to edit each post and place their full names just so people know that I'm no joke.  A question I often ask myself is "Do people actually read these?"  If I have actual people reading my posts it makes my day brighter.  It takes a lot of courage and comfort in ones self to post their life on the web.  I would just love to say thank you readers!  Those that I talk about in my posts I would like to say thank you for the experience and I love and hate you all!

Sincerely,
True Predictions!

Being In Love

This post coincides with the previous post "Ratings Vary."  I was talking to the same guy in the previous post about what we want in life (relationship wise) and at this point we are still friends that have minor feelings for each other.  In the past I told him that I loved a certain guy (reminder I am just a helpless girl that is clueless about everything).  After I told him this he tells me that it would never happen because of reasons.  I have already had the urge to punch and/or slap him so those feelings were just heightened.  Recently he told me that he was in love with his ex girlfriend and I was a nice friend and asked him all the right questions and said all the right things, but in my head I was saying "why the hell do you love this basic chick that obviously doesn't give a single fart about you.  She has played you and you don't even realize.  You are the sweat on the palms of her hands.  Nobody give a fart about the sweat on our hands and that is why we, as humans, wipe it off.  If a girl does not date you then either she or you fucked up and nothing will make things go back to normal."  I'm so sorry for my language in these past posts, but a boys stupidity makes me hella pissed.  At least with my "love" neither one of us did anything to each other.  Honestly we all have to remember that guys fall for girls twice as fast as a girl would fall for a guy.  This guy I'm texting also fails to remember that the girlfriend before his "love" was also his "love" so there really is no point to this conversation.  I don't even see the point of this blog post because I am just ranting.  I also have no advice to give because I see no point in this post.  Thanks for reading anyway.

Sincerely,
True Predictions!

Ratings Vary

One time I was talking to this guy and he had told me he liked me and I told him that I liked him.  One day we were texting and we decided to give each other a rating from 1-10.  I gave him a nine, I believe, and then he responds saying I was a solid seven.  The amount of anger and fury that pulsed through my body was real.  I wanted to punch his face through the phone.  He then goes on to explain that he doesn't believe anyone is perfect.  I understood that, but why the fuck was he making me average when I believed he was extremely hot.  I was depressed, pissed, and less confident that night and on top of all of that I wanted to punch my crush and make him feel pain.  I did not show my anger through the rest of the texting conversation that night.  Recently we started talking again, as friends, because I could never date that douchebag.  We bring up the rating again and this time I do not rate him.  He again rates me as a seven and my frustration and anger comes back as a deja vu moment.  After his rating I then tell him my rating for him and gave him a seven as well for his basic ass and for pissing me off and for his personality.  I now realize that one should never return to a lost love because they are still the same as before.

Sincerely,
True Predictions!

Boy Trouble!

So I know I said that I was done with boys, but one of the boys in my recent life (blog) has taken over my thoughts.  I cannot get rid of the thoughts of him and it is killing me.  The bad part about all of this is that he seems to not give a single f*** about me.  Or maybe I am overreacting.  We don't text as often, we barely do the normal stuff we used to, and we are always busy.  I can't help that I am forming a crush.  This is happening to me quite easily because we go way back as friends.  I do not want to fall for him and get screwed like corn.  I am over here thinking "oh how lovely would it be to do this and that and see this and that...with him *twinkle eyes*."  No, absolutely no!  I will not be the only one with a crush.  I absolutely hate having a crush and having there be no possible way he can be all mine.  There is something even worst about this situation.  I want to tell him how I feel, but I can't because he says he doesn't want a relationship.  If that is not friend zoning then I don't know what is.  For once on this blog I have no help to give.  I'm so very sorry *sobs in the background.  At this moment in life I need someone else to give me advice on what I should do.  Right now I am waiting for summer because there will be more free time, but that is extremely hard to do when I can't even finish my homework at a normal time because of my distracting thoughts.  I have also tried to think about others such as celebrity crushes or other cute guys, but nothing is working.  When I fall for a guy (like truly fall...like a serious crush), there is no getting out of that zone.  I do not have time for this.  I could seriously be pimpin down the halls of school like "yea guys I am single and ready to mingle," but I can't do that because the state of mind that I am in makes me think only of him.  At this point I am ranting and rambling so I will stop and end this before I go too far off topic.  Good luck to those who have a possible formation of a crush like me!

Sincerely,
True Predictions (no prediction right now though)!

New Obsession

I need a new obsession.  I know I'm over all the guys and focusing on my work and all, but I'm slightly bored during my free time.  I'm sure the obsession will come soon enough.  They always come right after one obsession ends because that's what teenagers do.  For now, I guess I just chill still.  I sound like an addict.  I should not be posting half asleep late at night.

Sincerely,
True Predictions!

Free Time

I rarely get free time to just chill alone. Recently I've been making time for that. Like today for lunch I went outside and sat on a bench swing and all of last week for break and lunch in school, I found a new place to be alone and sit and think. It's made me more calm and collected. I feel like a hippie without the presence of weed and soothing music. The time spent alone is the time I cherish for my junior year. My advice you all you girls and maybe some guys out there is to cherish your time alone and if you get that time, make time for it. Even if it's only five minutes. 

Sincerely,

True Predictions!